Last week, I wrote about connection. This week, I’m continuing with that theme, but I have two questions for you first:
1. What do you desire most in terms of your health?
2. What is keeping you from having that desire?
Last fall, I posted a survey on Facebook and found that the two most popular answers to the first question were losing weight and eating a healthier diet. Other answers, in order of popularity, were aging well, sleeping well, and reducing or eliminating specific issues or symptoms. I would imagine, had I listed it as an option, some of you would have also answered building a healthier immune system.
Along with those physical issues are usually some mental and emotional issues: you want to experience less stress and overwhelm and you want to feel better about yourself. Maybe it’s even deeper than that. I’ve been taught that you need burrow down about five layers to discover the why behind the why behind the why behind the why . . . but more about that some other time. Right now, I’m interested in this question:
If, six months ago, you would have answered my survey with any of the above answers and if now, six months later, you have not made any progress towards those goals, what is keeping you from them? Sure, we all have excuses. “I’m too busy working/taking care of kids/taking care of parents/taking care of everyone except myself.” But what is the REAL reason, and what would it take to get you to commit 100% to your personal health evolution?
My guess is it’s not a lack of information. We all know what we SHOULD be doing. In fact, there are a ton of diets and programs out there that will get you where you want to go, at least in the short term (i.e. not all programs are sustainable). Most of them will scratch the surface of your needs: you might lose 10 pounds; you might start exercising more. But if you’re looking for deep, integrative, lifelong health evolution, you need two things: a comprehensive plan and group of supportive people headed in the same direction you want to go. Of the two, the second will make the biggest difference.
In the past, I tried going it alone. And at times, when I was really motivated, I made some progress. But motivation waxes and wanes. As humans, we’re not wired for constant motivation. What we are wired for is connection, deep connection with other humans. We want to be a part of something. We want to feel like we belong. We NEED to feel supported.
So often, when I meet with people one on one about their health goals, I hear, “I need someone to hold me accountable.” These individuals understand that peer support is crucial to hitting their goals. They know that groups evolve faster than individuals. They also know that you can’t just throw a random group of people together and expect to evolve. The people in the group have to have the same level of desire to go where you want to go, and someone in the group needs to be a few steps further along the path than the others.
There’s a theory floating around out there that you are an average of the five people you spend the most time with. Take a moment and think about who that is for you. Are those five people influencing you in a good way? Are they on the path you want to be on? Or do you need to meet new people and cultivate new relationships?
If the latter is true, contact me! My Body Wisdom health coaching group is full of women who are on a growth path, who are committed to becoming better versions of themselves, and who support each other 110% every day. If that sounds like where you want to be, I’ll sit down with you one on one to see if you’re a good fit for our group. If you are, I promise, six months from now, you will be further along the path.
I hope to hear from you.